Franking Frankie


Just out of frustration I tried listening to that other radio show, the Frankie one. And oh boy, something is not right there.

Honestly, I can’t tell if it’s supposed to be a joke or not but its worth looking into I think.

I mean, just listen to this:

“F: And now on to the next caller! Alright fellow Frankie
listener, you’re now live what is your question?
Scared Caller: Frankie! Oh, my gosh! You have to help me!
I’ve been abducted! I haven’t seen the faces of my abductors
and they haven’t said a word to me! I don’t know where I am,
and I don’t know what to do! I need help! Will you tell me
what to do?
F: You sound very frantic. First let’s start with a
breathing exercise to calm you down. Take a five second
inhale through the nose... and a five second exhale through
the mouth with a nice HA sound. Haaaaa. Now, let’s get back
to the main issue. Listeners, everyone gets lost sometimes,
it’s a fact of life; however, sometimes escaping isn’t worth
it if you’re enjoying yourself. Here’s a song dedicated to
all of you who are feeling a little lost tonight.
[SONG STARTS]
[SONG: Private Eyes by Tall and Coates]
[SONG ENDS]
F:- Well, listener what did you think of the song?
Scared Caller: [Phone Static]
F: Huh, I guess she dropped her phone from all that dancing
we heard on the line earlier.
V: That song was just what she needed Frankie.”

Now, either this is some sort of acting thing or Frankie is a fucking idiot. Either way, this is a from a broadcast over a year ago.

I’m going to listen to more and try and sparse out if it’s legitimate or not. Let me know if anyone knows any more about it.

Freaky Frankie Update


Here’s some other sections of the show worth at least considering. It’s all a bit absurd so it’s hard to know what to take seriously, but here it is, in transcript form for you assholes with shitty computers (with the exception of Kait):

“F: Greetings. Do you have a question about statues for us?
C1: I do. I’m a docent for the Ringling Museum. I’ve noticed
that there’s a statue pit located at the back of the museum.
The statues there look oddly familiar. Honestly, they look
like other docents and just everyday people. I find it very
hard to look at them. I feel strange around the other
statues as well. Like they’re watching me. What should I do?
F: Well first off, the statues are watching you. They’re
watching everyone; however, it sounds to me like you’re
suffering from a lack of confidence. Perhaps you’ve been
under a lot of stress lately. Is your partner putting you
down? Were you bullied during your childhood?
[SAD VIOLIN MUSIC]
C1: No, I-
F: My advice to you is be confident and bold! You should
always look people in the eyes. In fact, look the statues in
the eyes. Don’t break eye contact, ever. Get lost in their
eyes...
Here’s a little song for you and all the other listeners who
struggle with confidence. And no, it’s not Confident by Demi
Lovato.”

“C3: Hi guys. So, my question stems from an observation. I
noticed that just east of the center of St. Armands there is
a circle of statues. My friend and I go there a lot and
we’re just not sure of the significance of the circle or the
statues. Do you two have any ideas?
V: I believe you’re talking about the 7 virtues statues.
There’s music, learning, flora, sculpture, water, medicine,
and bounty.
F: Seven statues, huh? Put seven people in the circle. Have
one person stand in front of each statue. Stand there. Feel
the statues watching you. All statues are watching. All
statues are trying to get out. They just want to be free-
V: Unfortunately, it’s about that time where we end out
show.
F: It sure is, Vladimir.”

Not sure what the obsession with statues is in this town, but Frankie’s responses give me goosebumps. Not the good kind.

Serena always was talking about the symbolism involved with sculptures and art in a culture. Maybe it’s worth visiting some of these places.

I was traveling around yesterday and I guess my wifi kept dropping because some of Frankie’s recordings wouldn’t load, but I did hear an ad for Sun’s Up. Which is annoying.

Does any of this sound like it’s even slightly related to Serena? Or is it s a waste of time?

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